My journey began 8 years ago after experiencing the unimaginable......

 My youngest daughter became very unwell and was diagnosed with a brain tumour aged only 15 months old. After treatment, numerous brain surgeries and a fight so fierce from somebody so little....she passed away aged 2 years and 10 months old. On 21st October 2017 at 11.11 am...My heart was shattered when my darling girl took her last precious breath.

 I was completely consumed with grief and trauma and at times felt I couldn't carry on. I didn't recognise myself and felt that the day I buried my daughter..... I buried myself also....My soul had died with her. Who I was , was changed irreversibly. But I had to find a way to keep going....if not for my own sake but for my remaining children. I had to find myself, rebuild myself from scratch.

I began reading into religion....I felt a desperate need to find the truth....to know where my daughter had gone. But the more I read....the more confused I became. So many different theories and views....all seemingly contradicting one another. It wasn't that I couldn't connect with any of them....quite the opposite...it was that I felt a connection to them all. The more I read back into history....the more I realised that each religion appeared to have been based upon the same guidance, morals and beliefs...such as the presence of angels and a deep faith in some kind of fatherly figure. Only through time....and the meddling of man....some of the scriptures were altered....parts taken away and parts added which ultimately created divide. 

I began to find myself drawn to a more esoteric perspective. I found comfort in them and although I still wasn't able to find the truth I was searching for.....I felt more at ease with the unknown. The funny thing was....I was always interested in these things from being a child.....I would gaze at the moon and make spells in the garden...collect rocks and crystals and feel happiest when surrounded by nature. I remember feeling like this life is simply a matrix.....never felt like I truly belonged and always felt somewhat different. Then as I grew older...I became embarrassed of those quirks.....I forced myself to conform....to be like everybody else. Society took its hold as it so often does and I forgot who I was meant to be.

My daughters death well and truly woke me up from whatever slumber I had been in all those years. The things I thought were important before seemed pointless and unsatisfying. I realised that I hadn't died with Jorja, She had woken me! And her death being at 11.11 cemented that fact. I truely believe with my whole heart that she was an angel...Sent to teach myself and so many others a truly important lesson. 

Of course, I still hurt....and miss her more than words could explain but I know deep down she is still with me in all I do....and I know that we will be reunited one day. Until that day I feel an immense need to make her proud and to follow the path I was meant to follow...be true to myself and try to spread love and light...just as my darling daughter did during her short precious little life.

So that's my reason for this...                                      An Esoteric Escape isn't just a money making scheme. Its an attempt to share the things that helped me through the darkest moments in my life. An attempt to connect people with practices and tools that might help them find their highest selves...and each other and if I can help even just one person experiencing the same feelings as I felt to find hope and peace again...I will feel as if I have found my purpose.

Life can be hard...almost every one of us have experienced some sort of trauma or grief and often this can lead to serious mental health problems, addictions and basically unsuccessful and unhealthy attempts to fill a void. I am no stranger to these behaviours. My aim is to help fill those voids....to create a space where we can support and learn from one another..... I still have so much to learn so I am in no way saying I am an expert in all of this! But I do feel I have found my path....my peace....and my power....and I want to help you find yours too!

A mention for my children Corey, Demi, Jaydan, Maximus and Jaimee-Leigh and Grand daughter Remmie-Lee

I may have harped on about how my love of crystals and magic and all the weirdness that makes me your crazy mother here,....and whilst it is true and they have helped me massively. My true saviours are you guys! You gave me a reason to get up every morning.... ignited a strength within me I felt at times I didn't have...You made me push harder than ever to try and heal the broken parts of me and to become the best version of myself.

I am immensely proud of you all....beyond grateful to have you by my side and I love you more than words could ever explain

Mum xx